Where Is Home?
You know the old expression ” Home is where the heart is?” Well I have been trying to find that out for the last 20 years…. And yes if my husband could read this right about now he would roll his eyes big time and give me a big ” PLEASE!! ” I must give him credit though, in my search for finding “home,” he has bent over backwards to help me on my quest of finding it.
I was born in Sweden but because of my dad’s work, we moved when I was 3 years old and I spent the next 15 years in Argentina and Spain. I absolutely loved growing up in Spain but I also feel that this is also where my rootlessness started, not to mention, the constant feeling of being a cultural mess…. I didn’t feel Swedish growing up, in fact I thought Swedes were weird, cold and stuck up but at the same time I didn’t feel Spanish either. I mean I spoke Spanish like a Spaniard but with my long blonde hair and blue eyes I stuck out like a sore thumb.
After high school, just to confuse me a little bit more, my parents thought it was a good idea for me to go one year in an American university. You know, so I could “figure out whether to continue my education in Spain or Sweden,” but it didn’t turn out quite like they thought.
I spent my first year of college in a small town in Georgia, loving every minute of it and somehow convinced my parents to fund four more years of fun, when I could of actually gone to college in Sweden for free. That’s right FREE!!! Don’t know how I pulled that one off but somehow I did and I graduated from Georgia Southern University in 2000 and at this point, I was also starting to feel at home in the US. After graduating I got a one year work permit before having to move back to Europe, so I decided last minute to call up my brother in Sweden. I actually convinced him to fly to the US and drive cross country with me to try out our luck in LA.
When we got there, reality started to kick in…. I had no job, nor apartment and my brother had to go back to Sweden. I was left all alone in this big city. Thinking back, I was very lucky that my little adventure didn’t end up in a disaster but somehow these years in California ended up being some of my best years. The first job I applied for was a hostess job at Pierview Café in Malibu and to my surprise, I got the job and it really changed my life. This is where I met a wonderful group of people who ended up becoming some of my great and even best friends and many whom I still keep in touch with. At Pierview, I also formed a great friendship with sweet Brianna and not to mention, this is where I first met my husband!
After a couple of fun filled years in California, I ended up marrying the love of my life and moved to Arizona for a year for my husband’s work, but we quickly realized desert life was not for us. We ended up moving back to California for two more years and in 2006 we had our first daughter, Mckenna. Soon after that, the moving bug started to kick in and we ended up moving to Portland Oregon in 2008, where my second daughter Linnea is born. My mind was settled for a couple of years, but then the moving bug kicked in once again. I kept bringing up new places to live to my husband. Places like Colorado, the Carolinas, Boston, and many others. We actually ended up taking a few trips to places like Wilmington, NC and Boston, Mass., but every time we did these trips I ended up realizing how much I loved Portland. But even so, I felt like there was something missing. That something is my Swedish family…..
Ever since my first daughter was born, I had dreamt about moving back to Sweden to see if this is where my real home is, but it was never a possibility until my husband started his own company about 4 years ago. After a lot of back and forth, we finally decided to take the plunge and about 1 ½ years ago we sold everything we had and moved home. Or at least what I was hoping would be home….Tune in next week to find out how that move went!2